When you’re home sick in bed, things can get pretty boring. Aside from sniffling and sneezing, you likely have a lot of time on your hands between naps and Netflix binges. Why not have a little fun with that time by coming up with some corny pickup lines tailored to the sick and afflicted?
We’ve gathered some of the best (or worst, depending on how you look at them) illness-themed pickup lines that are sure give your immune system a boost…of laughter. Consider whipping these out the next time you video chat your crush while quarantined with the flu. Just remember – timing and delivery make all the difference between eliciting an eye roll or a laugh.
Here are some pickup lines for various maladies:
- Feeling feverish? “You make my temperature rise.”
- Got the chills? “You give me fever when you hold me tight.”
- Battling a nasty cold? “I think you just took my breath away.”
- Cough keeping you up? “They say laughter is the best medicine. Want to be my nurse?”
- Stuffy nose got you down? “I may not be able to smell roses at the moment but I can still catch your lovely scent.”
- Plagued by seasonal allergies? “I’m allergic to everything but you.”
- Sore throat making talking tough? “My throat may hurt but my heart still skips a beat when I see you.”
- Wrestling a stomach bug? “Nothing settled my stomach like talking to you.”
Yes, these are super cheesy but that’s what makes them funny! When you’re sick and bored, you gotta make your own entertainment.
So try out some of these pickup lines next time you’re under the weather. Just don’t be surprised if your crush diagnosis you as a hopeless romantic.
